Haw Maw, is this true? Ahm ah maer scots than ah
thought?
True Scot
You know you are a true Scot if????.
1. Ye can properly pronounce McConnochie,
Ecclefechan, Milngavie, Sauchiehall St, St Enoch,
Auchtermuchty and Aufurfuksake.
2. Ye actually like deep fried battered pizza fae
the chippie.
3. Yer used tae four seasons in wan day.
4. Ye canna pass a chip/kebab shop withoot sleverin
when yer blootert.
5. Ye kin fall about pished withoot spilling yer drink.
6. Ye see people wearin shell suits with burberry
accessories pure class!
7. Ye measure distance in minutes.
8. Ye kin understaun Rab C Nesbitt and know
characters just like him, in yer ain family.
9. Ye go tae Saltcoats cos ye think it is like gaun
tae the ocean.
10. Ye kin make hael sentences jist wae sweer wurds.
11. Ye know whit haggis is made ae and stull like
eating it.
12. Somedy ye know his used a fitba schedule tae
plan thur wedding day date.
13. You've been at a wedding and fitba scores are
announced in the Church/Chapel.
14. Ye urny surprised tae find curries, pizzas,
kebabs, fish n chips, iron-bru, fags and nappies all
in the wan shop.
15. Yer holiday home at the seaside has calor gas
under it.
16. Ye know irn-bru is a hangover cure.
17. Ye learnt tae sweer afore ye learnt tae dae sums.
18. Ye actually understand this and yurr gonnae send
it tae yer pals .
19. Finally, you are 100% Scot if you have ever said/heard these words;
How's it hingin?
Clatty
Boggin
Cludgie
Pished
Get it up ye!
Wee beasties
Erse bandit
Amurny
Away an bile yer heid!
Peely-wally
Humphey backit
Ba'-heid
Baw bag
Dubble nugget
And finally......
A wee Glesga wumman goes intae a butchershop, where the butcher has just came oot the freezer, and is
standing haunds ahint his back, with his erse aimed
at an electric fire.
The wee wumman checks oot the display case then asks, "Is that yer Ayrshire bacon?"
"Naw," replies the butcher.
"It's jist ma haun's ah'm heatin'.!!!!!
