Lucas Electrics

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AZ Pete
Posts: 20
Joined: Sun Sep 02, 2012 7:41 pm

Lucas Electrics

Postby AZ Pete » Thu Dec 27, 2012 1:14 am

Electrical Theory - by Joe Lucas





Positive ground (they meant "earth") depends on proper circuit functioning, which is the transmission of negative ions by retention of the visible spectral manifestation known as smoke.

Smoke is the thing that makes electrical circuits work. We know this to be true because every time one lets the smoke out of an electrical circuit, it stops working. This can be verified repeatedly through empirical testing.

For example, if one places a copper bar across the terminals of a battery, prodigious quantities of smoke are liberated and the battery shortly ceases to function. In addition, if one observes smoke escaping from an electrical

component such as a Lucas voltage regulator, it will also be observed that the component no longer functions. The logic is elementary and inescapable!

The function of the wiring harness is to conduct the smoke from one device to another.

When the wiring springs a leak and lets all the smoke out of the system, nothing works afterward.

Starter motors were considered unsuitable for British motorcycles for some time largely because they consumed large quantities of smoke, requiring very unsightly large wires.

It has been reported that Lucas electrical components are possibly more prone to electrical leakage than their Bosch, Japanese or American counterparts. Experts point out that this is because Lucas is British, and all things British leak. British engines leak oil, British shock absorbers, hydraulic forks and disk brake systems leak fluid,

Therefore, it follows that British electrical systems must leak smoke. Once again, the logic is clear and inescapable.

In conclusion, the basic concept of transmission of electrical energy in the form of smoke provides a logical explanation of the mysteries of electrical components especially British units manufactured by Joseph Lucas, Ltd.

And remember: A gentleman does not motor about after dark.

Joseph Lucas - The Prince of Darkness

A few Lucas quips:

The Lucas motto: Get home before dark.

Lucas is the patent holder for the short circuit.
Lucas - Inventor of the first intermittent wiper.
Lucas - Inventor of the self-dimming headlamp.

The three-position Lucas light switch: DIM, FLICKER and OFF.

The other three switch settings: SMOKE, SMOLDER and IGNITE.

The Original Anti-Theft Device - Lucas Electrics.

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simon
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Posts: 874
Joined: Fri Sep 07, 2007 11:58 am
Location: Northumberland

Postby simon » Thu Dec 27, 2012 6:01 pm

Ahh,, Joe Lucas.. Prince of Darkness!
Simon, now with a third
Yellow '98 R1100S
(..a bit more gimpy tho' [smilie=crutch.gif])

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AZ Pete
Posts: 20
Joined: Sun Sep 02, 2012 7:41 pm

Postby AZ Pete » Thu Dec 27, 2012 6:24 pm

Yes, sorry that I couldn't resist posting. I believe that this is the most comprehensive collection of Lucas bashing I had seen. It does bring fond memories of so many beautiful British bikes and cars of my youth though.

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oyster
Posts: 1236
Joined: Fri Jul 02, 2004 1:03 pm
Location: retirementland kent

Postby oyster » Fri Dec 28, 2012 8:40 am

Some time back the adage used to be 'Lucas, candle in a bottle'. Then we discovered Cibie!
Oyster. 1999 R1100S. Almost original.

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Dai wiskers
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Posts: 1262
Joined: Mon Jul 09, 2012 7:21 pm
Location: Caerphilly

Postby Dai wiskers » Sat Dec 29, 2012 9:51 pm

Had a Z beam on my Kettle
My bike shines when it rains!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Dyslexic Dai


Steptoe
http://www.gsshop.biz/


Dan Cata
http://boxer-upgrades.webs.com/


Lennie
http://www.boxer-performance.com/index.html


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